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Intentionally Dating Your Spouse

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April 2, 2019

After being married for thirty-six years, it’s EASY to fall into a rut and lose track of each other. We have been parents for thirty-two of those years and became grandparents almost five years ago. To say that our lives are full to over flowing would put it quite mildly.

Our youngest child graduates from high school this May, in seven weeks, so thoughts of being “empty nesters” has crossed my mind a time or two. (Our daughter will be living at home a bit longer but she will be a grown woman without needing us to watch over her quite as much.) I started having those thoughts two years ago when my third child graduated high school and headed off to a big university. My husband and I have become lost in our day to day lives, leaving little time or thought to spend on each other.

We used to do couples retreats and couples Bible studies, really working on keeping our relationship centered on God and strong. Somewhere along the way, after our twenty-fifth anniversary vow renewal and “honeymoon” trip, we let all of that grow less and less. We would have a dinner date or two here and there. Maybe one night in a local hotel once a year. Then, that stopped, too. It became a short lunch date sometimes with our teen and sometimes without. Not really a date.

When I think about it for a minute it is easy to see how it happened. In the last eleven years, that is how long it has been since our silver wedding anniversary, a LOT has happened. If you have read about our mission adventures, you know that starting in 2010 we began mission training that would take us into the next three years seeking how God would use us cross-culturally in another country. And how that door closed shortly after an amazing trip to Kenya one summer.

We changed our focus and I began teaching preschool again. I threw myself into that with everything I had. I tend to do that. All or nothing, as they say. He joined me in my preschool as a teacher’s assistant for a few years before going to work part time and then starting his own lawn business. Our first grandchild was born in 2014 and it has been busy ever since, filled with our adult kids, our high school kids and our grand kids, plus our work. If you don’t INTENTIONALLY make time for your spouse, there will be no time. Since my WORD for this year is INTENTIONAL, my marriage is one of the areas I am applying that word.

TODAY is our thirty-sixth wedding anniversary! WOW! That is rare in today’s world. We made a commitment, twice, to stick together through thick and thin, highs and lows, no matter what. Has it been a walk in the park? Not by a long shot. We are both human beings that fall short daily. Love is a CHOICE. Hear me, a choice. We CHOOSE daily to love each other despite our short comings and disagreements. But we ALSO choose to treat each other with respect and care for each other in the midst of those, too. We help each other out when we can. We support each other’s dreams and goals.

I could have easily just booked a local hotel, again, and gone to a movie or out to eat for the weekend. That sounded so boring and repetitive. I wanted to do something SPECIAL to show him HE was still important to me and that HE is my today and tomorrow. WE have the rest of our lives to live together and I want to build some amazing memories WITH him alone.

YES, I still want and will do family trips and fun things. I’m in no way saying I’m going to stop those. NO WAY!!! My kids and grandkids are SUPER high on my important list. But my man needs to be at the TOP only second to my relationship with my Savior. Our relationship has to be strong to hold our family together.

I want to encourage you to put effort into any and every relationship that is important to you. That doesn’t mean you have to go on long trips or spend a ton of money. We found a lovely cabin that was cheaper than most but ended up being one of the prettiest places we have ever been. It was a short three hour drive. We set aside the time and did it.

I can tell you that it really helped us reconnect after months of coming and going and barely having time to sit down and enjoy each other’s company.
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  • Home
  • About
    • Get Moving >
      • 30 Day Breakaway Round One 5K
      • 10 Rounds Tour Dallas
      • Color Run Tradition 2019
      • A Turn Around >
        • Family Life >
          • Grand Adventures March 2021
          • Just A Bit of Fun
          • Winter Storm of 2021
          • Looking Back At 2020
          • Like The Sands In An Hour Glass
          • Our Furbabies
          • Climbing Out Of The Muck
          • Celebrating Marriage 2020
          • This Simple Texas Girl’s Vision 2020
          • Christmas Adventures 2019
          • Not A One & Done Kinda Trip
          • Intentionally Dating Your Spouse
          • Hickory Moon Anniversary Trip
          • Bookmarking Through Life
          • Morning Devotional Living Heart Healthy
          • A Year In Review 2018
          • Happiest Place On Earth
          • Hello Weekend
          • Horseback Riding With My Girls
          • Mission Trip To Kenya 2011
      • Mother’s Day Transformation
      • First 15K
      • A Year In Review 2019
      • Half Marathon Lone Star 13.1
      • My First 5K
  • Food Fun
  • Toxin Free Living
  • BCAA Adventures
    • Habitats & Homes >
      • Places We Live
      • Rooms
    • Mother’s Day At School
    • Garden Plants & Weeds >
      • Planting Gardens
      • Garden Treasures
    • Small Sea Creatures >
      • Large Sea Creatures
      • Seascape
    • Exploring Space >
      • Giant Planets
      • Rock Planets
      • Space From Earth
      • Space & Sky
    • Read Across America 2021
    • Global Passport Wrap Up >
      • World Market
      • Global Passport
    • BCAA Valentine Party
    • Jurassic Land >
      • Dinosaur Body Parts
      • Types of Dinosaurs
      • Paleontology
    • Interactive Boards
    • Ice Castle >
      • Weather & Seasons
      • Island Fun >
        • Exploring The Island
        • At The Beach
        • Treasure Island Setting Sail
    • October Fun
    • Crawly Things >
      • Camouflage Bugs
      • Bug Homes
      • Backyard Bugs
      • Bugs and Crawly Things
    • May The Fourth
    • Exotic Birds >
      • Tree Birds
      • Bird Parts
      • In The Nest
      • Birds and Eggs
    • Wrapping Up Pond Life >
      • Life Around The Pond
      • Pond Life
    • Gold At The End Of The Rainbow
    • Read Across America 2020
    • Wrapping Up Rhymes >
      • Character Rhymes >
        • Number Rhymes & Valentines
        • Nursery Rhymes
    • How Babies Change >
      • Keeping Babies Safe >
        • Carrying Babies
        • Waiting For Babies
        • Baby Animals
    • The Week Before Christmas >
      • Wrapping Up Winter in the Woods >
        • Winter In The Woods Woodlands
        • Winter In The Woods Animals
    • Cooking Class Cupcakes
    • Organizing My Curriculum
    • Halloween Party 2019
  • Books Movies & More
    • The Runaway Bride by Jody Hedlund
    • A Reluctant Bride by Jody Hedlund
    • Bookaholic For Life
    • More Than Words Can Say by Karen Witemeyer
    • Roseanna M White…Author Spotlight
  • Products We Love
    • A Dream Is A Wish Your Heart Makes
    • What I love About Bend Soap Company
    • Scripture Lullabies Teddy Bear
    • Frozen 2 Scentsy Collection
  • Blog